High Contrast Grey.

I took this picture shortly after moving out to Seattle. The pose seems to fit the picture I took just this evening fairly closely. Its kind of odd seeing my aging in this short while of living in Seattle. Random, but I saw Amaryllis today. I was working and I don’t know if she noticed me at all, but it was still one of those random shocks to see her. Its odd how it seems that the people here go in waves, where you can be friends with a bunch of people and just lose contact with them to meet another bunch of people. I hope I don’t lose contact with this last group of people. I know that I will to some extent with leaving for a year to two years, sadly, but I hope that I can come back and still have this nice base of people going on.

Before the night of movies began Charlotte and I went off to a tattoo/piercing shop only about four blocks from her place and got pierced. Much of this was on a whim of us just wanting to progress our self image. Charlotte got two little stars on her left lobe (which she wouldn’t let me take a picture of…) and I got another cartilage on my left ear. Free pen and a Werther’s Original prepackage. No one from work noticed today and I think I’m just going to not say anything about it waiting for people to notice. Now I’m feeling as though I want to continue changing my image and am debating dying my hair. My job wouldn’t care, and once I leave I’m going to school which I don’t think would care either.. Meh. I’ve been leaning towards a blue black, but Charlotte suggested a red and maybe I could pull off a dark red.

Once again easily distracted and kidnapped. I was kidnapped to Charlotte’s to help decorate her wall with a Christmas tree and snowflakes made from construction paper. Then when Audrey left we cracked open the wine and watched our respective favorite films. The Dreamers and the Amateurs. One of those weekends I’m not going to forget anytime soon..

She came over today to hangout and make croissants after I didn’t even expect her to come over at all today since she has a friend visiting from out of town. The friend stood her up and I was kidnapped to seeing where her childhood in Redmond was.

I began today with all the intent of working on the comic for Becky’s Pox Party that is due on the beginning of the month, but was once again easily distracted. Though I did get the lettering done. Charlotte and Audrey came over to bake croissants and to hang out, which somehow turned into kidnapping me and taking me to Redmond on an adventure for visiting a special coffee house and trips down memory lane. It was all quite enjoyable seeing the extremes of these places that I have only heard of. We went through the different outdoor malls of Redmond and Bellevue to see their over-the-top Christmas decorations. It even seemed that as we drove through Bellevue that it was opening night for the decorations as people lined every aspect of the streets. ‘Bing’ in the lights of the Microsoft building in Bellevue, or at least one of the Microsoft buildings..

We didn’t have a rolling pin so I recommended using an empty wine bottle. We didn’t have an empty so we used a full bottle, but it became empty after this, because we had to drink it once it got covered in flour.

Thanksgiving 09. I went over to Dustin and Natasha’s for Thanksgiving. It was not really raining today, but still rain fell. Another of those many things that I have missed about Seattle. When I woke up at around 5am the rain was falling hard, like how I had left it when I fell asleep to Jurassic Park the night before (the sound of rain falling made me think that this movie was perfect, but somehow I was lulled into an early sleep). I attempted to watch some of the Avengers and work on artwork, but ended up including a jog and playing around too much on the computer before I left for seeing Dustin and Natasha. It is so nice to once again see those two.

Capitol Hill outside PettiRosso early morning. I had walked up to the door and tested the handle, but for some reason it was still locked and I decided to walk around the block and try again. Just down from the door I saw a pile of carpet. My first reaction was that it was blankets and that a homeless person was sleeping there, but upon closer look it was just a pile of nasty carpet thrown to the street, and while it is next to a dumpster it doesn’t seem to belong to it. Somehow PettiRosso exists next to this decay and grime of the city. I have been watching a lot of films with Brenna and when we decide to crash at her place to watch a film, or two, I have to park my car with an expiration at 6am. So far I have been moving my car over to work at 7am and then going for a nice relaxing breakfast at PettiRosso until work starts without getting a ticket. Over confidence can lead to downfall though.

Self portrait. I’ve been buying up the smaller suits that find their way to my work. Having to take in the pants of course, since it seems that even if someone can be my height they still have a gut.. but the jackets are usually good, to some degree. Unlike last time I worked at VV my teacup collection is not finding too many new pieces, though I have finally found a plain black one.

I fell asleep early last night. Probably a reaction to not falling asleep timely the night before, followed by waking up in time for work. Random dreams. One I was at a Target with the sis and it seems that we might have been camping in the electronics department. When I woke up early I started reading more of Nausea, though for some reason my mind started to wander while reading. With all the death that has been surrounding Charlotte this month it got me thinking about how close I was to actually dying this past summer on the top of that mountain. With how I had not noticed anyone near me in my rear view mirror only moments before she struck the back of my car, she must have been going quite fast. If she had ended up hitting my car and actually propelled it I could have been sent over the edge of the mountain.. Best not to think of such things.

Lindsay wants me to design a logo for a post New Year’s masquerade ball. The theme is to play off the masquerade ball scene in Marie Antoinette. Fueling my obsession with Mucha I’m thinking about doing something like the Moet & Chandon paintings with the circle framing and chopping the figure. [rerdrfeswafty ewsrfg ewazfgy6e4wqazftgy6e43azv juhyrx `cv`] <- I just spilled tea on my keyboard… here’s to hoping nothing goes seriously wrong. I’m thinking that for coloring I will use varying hues of blues to keep the New Year theme, perhaps silver stars within the circle… Not to sure on the dress color for the figure though… I could just keep it black and continue the masquerade painted mask as well as Marie Antoinette’s outfit theme. Meh, I’m sending Lindsay a link to this sketchbook sketch to see if she has any additional input.

I’ve been working on making a new painting of a cityscape. It is to be viewed from a bridge that passes above. In part inspired from when I took the bus to work the other morning and looked out over the U-District to see a smattering of buildings displaced from one another by the trees between. I started sketching this out onto a nice sized piece of watercolor paper, but as I went to sleep last night I’m thinking that I need to add another vanishing point because the buildings all feel too flat. I’m planning to paint out the entire city, going back to ink, and then adding the bridge with character sitting looking out in acrylic paint as a means to express depth. I’m a little afraid of this idea though because I’m afraid it will cover up a lot of my work on the cityscape.. meh, sometimes we all just have to bite the bullet. And get an amputation, with lead poisoning?

I watched (500) Days of Summer with Brenna the other night. The film struck really close to home and I was glad to not be watching it alone, as the sis recommended I not do. I loved the visual appeal of the film as well as the content, it came with a touch of classy and left with a touch of ‘why does that always happen?’ I saw my counselor for the first time in probably two years yesterday. She seemed pleasantly happy to see me and, as always, our session ran long. The sleeping was moderately better last night, but even still, I think I have a long ways to go before finally being able to have a nice relaxing night’s rest. I had a brief dream this morning of being in a diner that felt like it was in Georgetown (Seattle). I don’t remember what I ordered, but as I was getting ready to leave two men came in with freshly lit cigarettes which the waitress joked with them about on how under Washington law they had still yet to put up the no smoking sign. They walked ove...

Had an adventure today with Dustin, Natasha, and their little dog Mikia. The long drive to our hike reminded me of all the natural beauty that surrounds Seattle. The moss that covers everything. The little houses hiding in the trees. I have missed these two. We were lost for quite a while in trying to find the turn off for the hiking trail (which was French Creek and now with my francophilia will not be forgotten) and due to the sun setting so extremely early this far north we were not able to stay long, but we did get to walk and see some waterfalls. I wish my mind could stay distracted.

Sometimes I wish that she didn’t always seem to brighten my mood when spending time with her.

Turns out all my self reassuring was not actually correct. Vague.

I awoke early again this morning. As much as I keep telling myself to stop thinking about certain things I think I really need to confirm or deny certain things, and actually come out with what my life plans are at the moment. So not looking forward to sale day today. Since I’m already awake I think that I’m going to leave early and get a nice breakfast at PettiRoso. Hopefully by last break I’ll be able to figure out what is going to be going on with my life the next few months. Sigh. I really need more sleep.

I’ve had this odd ‘taste’ in my mouth the past few days that just doesn’t seem to go away. I’ve tried drinking it away, I’ve tried eating it away. It just comes back.

These cheap high protein bars taste nothing like their generic descriptive names. I really shouldn’t expect anything more I guess, being what they are, but I thought in grabbing the range in flavors that they would actually taste different from one another. I walked all the way to Charlotte’s apartment when I got home to surprise her (we were going to meet up anyways because the key her mum gave me didn’t work and I needed to get in somehow). I forgot my mobile in my car and when I got there the lights were all turned off and no one answered my taping on her window (jumping to get better reach on wet concrete was a bad idea, I almost took out the window of the apartment below her). I hurried back, got my mobile from my car, and turns out that she had arrived at her mum’s while I had been walking to her place. It was nice getting wet though. I picked up Nausea by Jean-Paul Sartre today for 27 cents. So far so good. Its written as a diary recounting different studi...

I had a dream that I was back in Billings and shopping at the IGA with my mum, but when I came out my car had been stolen. Seems like that could have been about on par with how that stay in Billings had been going. Odd thing was I didn’t really care about the car being stolen but about how I was going to let down Charlotte again telling her I was coming. I seemed to exist between my dreams and reality this morning. I would wake from a dream to realize it was not real and then fall right back in.

Cliché, maybe, but still a good expression of emotion. Thanks to Charlotte’s mum I now have a nice collection of good watercolor paper. I’m somewhat short on ideas for what to paint on it though… I’m thinking a post coitus morning living room scene, but that might just be because my mind keeps wandering away. Frustration.. Maybe the ending shot I had planned for the now defunct comic with two people kissing in shadow with building-less columns and Toletué at night in the background. Maybe? At least worth sketching out and playing with. I might just do that one as a pen and ink and computer colored though… meh. Je’n sais pas. It might be nice to do a painting for Charlotte’s mum though since she is letting me live here for cheap and did provide me with the paper. Plus she is an artist and seems to keep art up on the walls so it would be nice to contribute to that. Time to open up the sketchbook of ideas and work on a few more pages.

For some reason (I’d blame it on the lighting change) I began to feel tired around 18.30 and then fell asleep after watching some Battlestar Galactica at around 21.00. Finally getting a good night’s rest a few days in a row feels so nice. Bizarre dreams though. One was; I was stuck in an indie sandwich shop (in some kind of facsimile of Pioneer Square) and could not seem to figure out how to order because they didn’t have any kind of menu, but I kept seeing other people getting really good looking sandwiches. Then right as I was about to figure out ordering some random person from high school called me up asking me to give them a ride from Cornish in about 20 minutes. I was left debating if I could finish my sandwich in time to then go and pick them up. I’m down to my last cookie. They have been keeping me going in the morning until my first break at 10.00. Guess I should make some more. I was going to stop by my bank today and withdraw some money for rent, guess...

I finally finished watching Gilda, after many ‘stops and goes’ this summer. I wanted to actually pay attention as I watched it and all summer it seemed as though I was to be distracted. David had told me that it was a quintessential film noir film, but I’m not sure how I feel about that. It seemed to have aspects of Casablanca in it (casino, woman from previous relationship reentering life, and similar police presence), but of course could not even come close to Casablanca. I did enjoy the lack of understanding the past and everything about it was extremely vague and only understood through passing comments though. I now have Beast of the City to watch.

Didn’t exactly finish this before I left for Seattle, but I appear to be in the final stretch for finishing. As per usual, I’m not too sure what to do with the poster on the wall near the accordionist. I was thinking maybe doing a bit of collage, but then again that might pull it out too much of the rest of the image. I’m thinking something along the lines of a darker red. I got a flier the other night after the Tiger Lilies show that seems appealing to use a colorful piece of, but its actually someone’s art and it just feels to be a grey area that I don’t want to be in. Also debating on adding more detail to the buildings in the background or not. The coloring seems to work, but the lack of detail seems to contrast my style for the rest of the painting. Now hopefully when I do finish this picture I will be able to have some art up in my parent’s house that doesn’t get moved to the back room closet.

Finally getting a full nights rest feels so nice. These nights of waking up at three AM to only lay in bed until I have to get up are no fun at all. For some reason I woke up with the Ramones song ‘I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend’ stuck in my head. It has to be a least a few months since I heard that song.

Thanks to Becky my right hand now says PAR AVION. I finished reading Peter Pan this morning. That last chapter is a real heart breaker. Now that I have read the book it is definitely on that list of things that I should have read before seeing the movie (of course this would seem to always apply to anything Disney). So good. I should probably send the book back to the sis now (Since I took it from her pile of books she wanted to read). In my defense though, many of those books she took from my ‘want to read’ pile. I still have to finish Madeline is Sleeping, but the bizarre erotica is a bit too frustrating.. Lip biting.

I helped out Charlotte today by taking a photo of one of her pretty tea cups for her tea shop website. Which she has been creating in msPaint. Supposedly Charlotte has made a Sims2 character of me. I’m quite curious to see how this virtual perception of me has panned out. Perhaps somewhat like how I created my own version of my Seattle friends on my sister’s Sims3 game I got her? If only we could all live in a luxury apartment building together… Chandeliers for everyone.

Finally finished framing the original pen and ink copy of this drawing. Took some cardboard from the ground behind work and finally sealed it in. I was sitting back in PettiRoso, finally, looking around and seeing more color changes. I didn’t follow them exactly, but I think that adding a few of these colors helps create dimension from what was earlier a mess of a golden yellow. Still don’t know what to do about the pictures..

I’m starting work at VV again tomorrow morning. I feel a little odd about this. They say that they will be placing me into the men’s department. Not exactly the most fun section of VV, but it’s still a job. Meh. If anything I really need to work on getting an actually working sleep schedule. This whole waking up at odd hours is getting old.